Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Dear bubby (turning six).

Dear bubby,
I'm writing this the night before your sixth birthday.  Just now I snuck upstairs to peek in at you sleeping and you took my breath away.  I still cannot get over how perfectly cute you are, just like the day you were born.  You're so big now, with freckles and all!
Braden, I want you to know how very much I love you.  You are my one and only son.  You were born second to me, as a gift, I believe.  You have taught me everything about the mother that I want to be and who I am capable of being.  Every single day you have challenged me to dig inside of myself and rise up for you in some way.  It has been difficult on many occasions but it has always (every single time) been more rewarding than I could dream. 
You are the sweetest, most gentle, kindest, most amazing little guy I know.  You have a heart that is so big for people, and for God.  You love with such reckless abandon and I know that you are going to approach everything in your life the same.  I see so much of myself in you buddy, from the way that you love to the way that you fight.  You have a deep acceptance for the truth and you seek it in all you do.  You rebound well from anything new that is thrown your way.  You love selflessly and give compliments freely.  You adore your sisters and your friends.  You are a protector and a caregiver at heart.  You were given these gifts by an awesome creator, brother, and I pray you never forget that.  Please always use these special gifts in times of need and to give to others.  God would be so pleased to know you are living life with the kind of heart that He intended for you to have!
This year has been full of many changes, buddy, and my heart has been shattered watching you have to experience them.  I know you have been confused and hurt, angry and sad.  I want you to know that you have been incredibly brave.  My heart is broken to know that some of the changes you have experienced may alter who God intended you to be.  I pray differently, but ultimately only you can decide the kind of life that you lead in your future.  I can only pray that as you grow you will continue to trust me, that I am teaching you the correct and true things of God because this world is full of people and things who will lead you astray.  Please know, buddy, that I love you more than anything and all I want is for you to know a life that is full of rich, beautiful, satisfying things.  I hope that as you grow you will continue to seek that which is pleasing to God because they will ultimately fulfill you in every way that you desire. 
This year you have grown into quite the superhero!  You love action and ninja turtles, dinosaurs and hunting.  You are a fan of cowboy boots and oreos, as always.  You learned to ride your bike this summer and you lost your two front teeth!  You are growing up so quickly and I am proud of you every single day.  Your heart is unique.  I can say that with a great assurance and I hope you always know that you are set apart!  God created you with a purpose far greater than I can even imagine but when I look at you, I am reminded every single time. 
I hope that this year brings so much happiness for your heart.  I hope that you feel little and innocent and that you enjoy school every day as much as you are right now!  I pray that you will look back on this time and remember a resilient home full of love and laughter and a mommy who adores everything about you.  And although we have days that are hard, moments when we butt heads, I am always so thankful for your graceful heart.  You are tender, loving and so special, Braden. 
I love you buddy boy. 
You are a special gift to me; you made me a "boy mom," and I will forever be grateful! 
Happy Birthday bub!!!
Love, mama.

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