Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Autumn was redeemed to me the last 2 days.  It is crazy how fall-like weather instantly boosts my spirits and brings about something in me that is adventurous and light.  I got so much accomplished today and felt the Lord's spirit flowring freely around me. 
I have come out of myself a bit and I believe others can tell.  The last couple of weeks were very internal for me.  I know that days like that will come; often in waves, but I can feel myself gravitate back to normal-the new normal, of course.

Mabel had a great therapy session today.  She is getting stronger each day.  Little by little.  I even heard her therapist say, "Well that's a very good reflex to gain--something they get at about 3 months!"  Tonight I put her in the high chair to practice sitting.  Our therapist is going to be sewing her a little harness to help keep her trunk back while sitting so I look forward to that.  She just gets so tired after sitting for a long period of time and then she gets irritable.  We tried a new method with her today to help with her sensory and recognition skills.  It's called Willbarger Brushing.  We will be trying this a couple of times each day to see if Mabel has an easier time transitioning from one position to the other, being touched and held often, etc.  So new things are happening and it's encouraging!  I'm willing to do anything that they suggest.  I'm willig to try anything.

Although I'm anxious for summer, I am thankful for this day.  I am thankful for the cool air blowing through the house and the giggles from the sunset trampoline.  We had a summer dinner with a fall candle leaving a scent behind that carries me through these days with gladness.  I will smell it again someday and remember the way Braden smiled at me when he woke up from his nap or the pink sweater that Nora dressed herself in this morning.  I will most definitely remember my little woo girl looking so lovely and so big in her high chair.  It was a big moment.  I am so thankful.

There are seconds of heartache and deep grief, occompanied by wonder and worry.  And then there are moments like today when I am reminded of how beautiful life is and how many great things are in store for us.  There is a plan in the refining and I am praying that it be carried out in me.

Hoping for Summer's Autumn tomorrow.....


Shea Posey said...

I know this may be intrusive and I'm sorry if it is but i went back one night and looked at your pictures on facebook trying to locate when Mabel "got lost" I think is how you put it. Like she disappeared in her eyes. I think I started noticing it around November or so. But she's coming back. I just want you to know her story, and how hard you and your familt are perservering through it is touching my heart and I hope and pray you get the answers you're looking for and she will "come back" and be a normal baby.

rameelin said...

Hey Shea--
It's true that Mabel's seizures definitely inreased around that time and that is when we started noticing something daily. We went back not long ago and looked at pictures and I realized that she has never quite looked at me the way the other babies did and her tongue has always been out. That made me sad because I realized that what I thought were normal 'newborn things' were probably not. Thanks for noticing that she's comin back through her eyes though...she truly truly is! She amazes me:)
Thanks for your support!!!

Annie B. said...

Today's pic of Woo is adorable, andO agree with Shea. Mabel has really started to look like she is "coming back."She truly looks like she is focusing a little more, and looks stronger for sure.

I also share your love for Autumn. I put a fall scented air freshener in my Jeep on Sunday. Every time I get in my car is makes me so happy and calm. I never wish for time to pass even more quickly than it already does, but I often really find myself wishing for the crisp, fresh feeling of autumn. It is truly my favorite time of year. :)

Tiffany said...

I love this post, Ramee. You are so brave and beautiful and a true testimony as you are embracing this season in your life. You are walking this with such grace, and I pray others will see Jesus in you. Because you are just shining Him. Love you, Ramee.