Wednesday, February 16, 2011

weary wednesday.

Today I'm feeling sad.
I can't explain it. I'm not sure why.
But I am.

Today was spent driving Mabel to the pediatric opthamologist. The drive alone is exhausting but just getting there and having to wait, dilate her eyes, and then wait more--that is almost too much.

The report was good yet frustrating.
The Dr. confirmed that her eyes look 'structurally fine.' She agreed with me that she doesn't think Mabel is seeing the way that we would like her to be. She said that it's as if the signal from her eyes to her brain and vice versa doesn't seem strong enough. It's confusing because the MRI didn't show anything along those lines but that is exactly how I would describe her vision if I were asked to.

Today I also got the ball rolling for being referred to a geneticist.
This will be good for us as I believe we will finally receive answers from this type of Dr.
Mabel's opthamologist today did say that she wants us to meet with the geneticist first, but that if no syndrome was confirmed as a diagnosis for Mabel, she would then refer us to a greater eye specialist in the Chicago area.
She seemed concerned and confused with Mabel's vision which just frustrated and discouraged me again. I feel this exact same feeling after each appointment when I feel like the Dr's all see the exact things I'm describing but we can't find the source of the problems.

It confirms that I'm not crazy and that there is a concern and a need for this team around us, but it is upsetting to be let down each and every time.
Mabel girl; our sweet medical mystery.
...who is NO mystery to our God...

He is on the throne and He knows it all.
Because He made it all.
And today, through tears and emotions, that is all I know for sure.
I am so thankful that I can rest in His embrace tonight.
Are you?


Kristi said...

hugs & prayers. My cousin's sweet little guy has what sounds like a similar "issue" with his eyes - his eyes are structurally fine but his brain basically doesn't tell them to see. I'm not sure who they see (they live in Morton) but would be more than happy to find out if you'd like.

Tiffany said...

Oh, Ramee. I wish I had words, but I am at a loss. Lifting you up continually to the One who knows all. Love you.

brandy said...

<3 Praying!!